I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We left an ass print on the piano.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Randomize
