doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize