Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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