8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
