Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
