I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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