I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
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