Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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