Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
only you would photoshop your dick
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
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What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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