No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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