they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
