I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
