This girl is more easily done than said...
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
