i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
