They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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