I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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