I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
