last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
