me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
