There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
