Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
