i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
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and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
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we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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