Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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