there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
