Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
