I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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