i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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