all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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