its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
