I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Soap is not a condiment
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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