i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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