i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
