oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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