WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
