The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took my balls.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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