i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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