i permit you to call me
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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