I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
