Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
So many bounce houses so little time
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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