i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
