he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
