the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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