In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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