Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
