Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
