i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
