I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
