Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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