i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
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it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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