so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
