ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize