It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
